Positive Parenting: 7 Top Tips To Be A Better Parent With No Yelling

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How To Be A Better Parent ( Without Yelling)

As a mom myself, I know that raising kids can be tough. Whether you’re looking for ways to encourage your kids or teach them about accountability, these seven positive parenting tips can help you stay on track and be the best parent that you can be.

Keep in mind that there’s no such thing as a perfect parent, just as no child is perfect.

We’re all human and we all make mistakes with our kids. But let’s not be too hard on ourselves, alright?

Do your best each day and if you mess up, own it. Tell yourself (and your kids) that you will do better next time. Then simply pick yourself up, dust yourself off, straighten your crown, and carry on!

MOM HUGGING SMALL CHILD, TEXT OVERLAY POSITIVE PARENTING TIPS HOW TO BE A BETTER PARENT WITHOUT YELLING — 7 Positive Parenting Tips That Can
Help You Become A Calmer Parent

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7 Positive Parenting Tips: Raising Happy & Confident Kids

Set Boundaries

Maintaining boundaries in your relationship with your kids is essential for positive parenting. Present rules and boundaries in a positive way.

Just be matter-of-fact about it, don’t be harsh or mean.

Provide boundaries and expectations in a clear way that your child will be able to fully understand.

Life gets frustrating – for kids and parents – when clear boundaries and expectations are not conveyed in a way both people understand. Communication is so important!

Visual reminders work wonders for setting boundaries! Writing expectations on a whiteboard can help ensure everyone in the family is on the same page.

For younger kids, you can use a bristol or poster board to create a list of “House Rules”. We did this when our son was going through the “terrible twos and threes”. We made a bright and colourful poster with lots of stickers.

Chore charts are a great idea too! They are a fun way for little ones to help out around the house by learning how to perform simple chores.

Avoid Shaming

Another core element of positive parenting is to avoid shaming. There are ways to let your child know that their behaviour is unacceptable without shaming them. So, instead of saying “You’re 11 years old, don’t act like a baby!” you can tell them how and why their behaviour is immature or inappropriate.

The problem with shaming your kid is that it doesn’t teach them a thing. It will never help them understand why their behaviour is unacceptable.

Shaming or humiliating your child can cause future insecurities or can even escalate their not-so-great behaviour. It’s important to be clear and educate your child – no matter their age – instead of shaming them for something they may not understand.

You may have to repeatedly tell them why something isn’t appropriate, so try to be patient, but shaming is never the answer.

No Yell Parenting

One of the most essential parts of positive parenting is to stop the yelling.

There is never a need for yelling at your child unless they are running out into traffic or trying to touch a hot stove. In other words, in dangerous situations.

There are many other ways to get through to children in every other situation instead of raising your voice. You don’t like to get yelled at right? No one does. So why would you yell at your child?

positive parenting tips how to be a better parent without yelling

Research shows that yelling can have similar negative effects as corporal punishment

Many parents tend to get upset and yell too often. Yelling only escalates the situation. Basically, hollering at your child will teach them that it’s okay to holler back.

When a parent raises their voice or says mean things when they’re upset it teaches the child to do the same when they’re upset. Kids follow their parents’ example so yelling will become a learned behaviour for them.

Instead, try a serious tone or even a very low hushed voice. Yelling conveys anger, while a stern tone communicates authority.

My mom always just gave us “the look’, and we knew she was serious. Sometimes no words were needed at all, just that “look” would keep us in line.

Become A Less Stressed More Blessed Parent

One of the best things I ever did to learn how to be a better and less stressed parent was through Amy McCready’s Positive Parenting Solutions. She has a free masterclass (yes, free) and I swear, I stumbled upon it at the exact right time in my life. What I learned from Amy has 100% helped me keep my sanity as a mom! You can sign up for her webinar here and in just an hour you will get a wealth of parenting know-how! It’s for parents of kids from 2-15 and everywhere in between!

Find The Root Of The Behavior

There’s always a reason that a child misbehaves, and focusing on the reason behind the behaviour can help stop it. It’s important to ask questions and talk to them one on one while listening to what they’re saying.

Listen and try to understand why it’s happening.

Try to honestly connect with them and find the root of the problem.

There’s usually a lot more to the negative behaviour than the behaviour itself. You may need to dig deep to get to the bottom of it. That doesn’t mean being pushy. Your child will talk when they are ready.

If they’re shy about opening up to you, journaling is a great tool to have in your wheelhouse!

Get a parent and child journal so you can write notes back and forth. It’s much easier for most kids to write what they’re thinking and feeling than to say it out loud – especially to us as parents, and especially we are are part of the problem.

Use Rewards Not Punishments

Offering a reward system may help your child have a reason to behave well. However, try to use rewards like toys, objects, or piggy-bank cash, sparingly because these can seem more like bribes.

I’m not saying I never offer these things as incentives but a fun family outing like spending time at the playground or a splash pad works really well too!

Using extra quality time or positive reinforcement as a reward for good behaviour works really well!

If your child has positive behaviour for a few days then you can suggest doing an activity that they really enjoy with them. playing a board game, cooking or baking with them, for example.

The positive parenting style focuses on rewards and praise, not punishments. It has been found to be more effective for helping with behaviour problems in the long run.

Praising kids for staying on track will lift them up, build their character, and help turn them into the most awesome little humans you could ever imagine!

It’s crucial to let them know that what they’re doing is good, great, amazing even and especially that you are PROUD of them!

Lead By Example

A significant aspect of positive parenting is to lead by example and model behaviour. As stated earlier, children tend to copy their parents.

Teaching them manners, kindness, empathy, and respectful behaviour is essential, of course, but you have to SHOW them the way.

If you’re respectful and kind towards them and others in everyday life, they will see this in real-time.

In other words, parents need to practice what they preach!

Do this with simple and random acts of kindness while you’re out and about with your kids.

You know, smile at people, be nice, hold doors open for people, pay for someone’s coffee in the drive-through, be pleasant and have manners when interacting with shop clerks or servers in restaurants. Just be a kind, respectful person yourself in your day-to-day life…simple stuff.

The best way to teach kids manners and respect is by acting this way yourself!

Another way to lead by example is to apologize to your children when you’re wrong.

When we as parents make a mistake, we have to say I’m sorry! We are not perfect and we all mess up from time to time. You have to be the first to admit when you’ve made a mistake.

This is an awesome learning opportunity for our kids to see us apologize when we mess up!

Follow Through!

Following through is another cornerstone of positive parenting, one of the most important tips!

Threatening consequences repeatedly without following through on them will show your child that what they do isn’t bad and that they will not get in trouble for it, even if you get upset over it.

This doesn’t mean you should punish your child for everything they do; it means you shouldn’t set up a consequence if you’re not going to follow through on it.

This isn’t only said for consequences, it also goes for actions and rewards.

For example, if you tell your child that if they get good grades then they will get ice cream, then you don’t follow through on your side of the reward, they may think that their grades really aren’t that important to you.

Even worse, they might think that you aren’t proud of them.

Don’t make promises that you can’t keep because it can cause your child to not trust you.

These Positive Parenting Tips Can Help You Become A Calmer, Happier & Better Parent

Babies and kids don’t come with instructions and every child is unique. this I understand! I have found that these positive parenting techniques have been fantastic tools for my husband and me to work with on our parenting journey.

If you try this parenting style for yourself and mindfully follow these tips in real-life situations, you may just find things get a little smoother.

Mother and daughter plant green plants in the greenhouse. A blonde girl and her mother are engaged in gardening. POSITIVE PARENTING TIPS how to be a better parent

Communication is key so always keep those lines open with your kids and lead by example.

And remember, there is no such thing as a perfect parent so give yourself some grace on days when things don’t go smoothly.

Parenting is hard…really hard and raising tiny humans is a tough gig some days. On those days, I want you to remember this…hang in there because this too shall pass and you are doing a terrific job!

There are a TON of great resources out there for parents to learn all about positive parenting and how to be a better parent. I’ve listed a few below to get you started.

Until next time, K.

Kelly Blakely is the founder and creative force behind Just Our View From Here. As a first-time mom over 40, she brings a fresh perspective to parenting and family life on her blog. Kelly also explores a wide range of lifestyle topics in her writing, including fashion, beauty, self-care, and well-being.