Should You Wake Your Child To Pee at Night? Nighttime Potty Training

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What’s Inside:

Helpful Hints For Night Time Potty Training
- Should you wake your child to pee at night for potty training or not?
What Is The 'Dream Wee"?
- Physical challenges of lifting your child to pee at night.
Why is Night Time Potty Training Different From Day Time?
Oh Crap Night Time Potty Training Tips
Night Time Potty Training: Final Thoughts

Helpful Hints For Night Time Potty Training

Should you wake your child to pee at night for potty training or not?

To wake or not to wake, that is the question when it comes to nighttime potty training your child. Will you take the dream wee approach and lift your child half-asleep onto the toilet or will you just wait it out until they are dry overnight on their own? How long should you wait?

What worked for us was being patient and not stressing over it, and one day it just happened. We didn’t do the lift.

Maybe we got lucky.

should you wake your child to pee at night when potty training

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And as with all things toddler-related, there simply isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer to the question of whether or not you should wake your child up to pee at night or not. But if you are considering trying the dream wee and are interested in learning more about it, I would like to share our thoughts on it for what it’s worth to help you make an informed decision.

When we potty trained our son for daytime at 2-1/2, we followed the Oh Crap Potty Training Method (OCPT) by Jamie Glowacki and we had great success. So when we were ready to ditch the overnight diapers, we used that as a guideline. We weren’t quite sure if the sleep pee technique was going to work for us but we were willing to consider it if needed.

What Is The ‘Dream Wee”?

Quite simply, it’s a middle-of-the-night pee initiated by the parent (not the child) that is done quickly and quietly.

It’s quite similar to the dream feed, when they are babies. The dream wee is when you lift your child out of bed and shuffle him into the bathroom to pee just before you go to bed yourself. Also called the dream pee or sleep pee.

So if you put your child to bed at 7-8, and you go to bed at 11-12, that’s the time. It’s not a lights on, wide awake chat it up party, more like a sleepy pee.

We did toss it around, doing the dream wee or the lift. After all, we had great success with the OCPT method and that was the recommended course of action for nighttime potty training. But we still weren’t sure what to do. Should we try to wake this child who was completely lights out, to pee at night? It just seemed like a crazy and insurmountable feat.

Ultimately, we decided to let it ride for a bit until that brain-body connection was established but would take it to task if he wasn’t staying dry by 4-1/2.

Granted, that’s a bit later than Oh Crap recommends but it worked for us. One of the best things we like about the OCPT method is that the author recognizes flexibility. She recommends taking what works from her method and using it as you see fit as a parent. Nothing is set in stone as every child is unique.

We were a little worried if we waited too long we might miss our window of opportunity. So that’s why we set a time limit.

If you’d some more info on The Oh Crap method, how and why it works check out:

Oh Crap Potty Training: Our Experience

Physical challenges of lifting your child to pee at night.

The main reasons we chose not to try the lifting were purely physical. Two determining factors for us came into play in our decision. First, our kid is a pretty big kid. At 4 he is close to 4 feet tall already and weighs around 50 lbs. He’s solid. Secondly, he’s a pretty deep sleeper. We were pretty sure he wouldn’t wake up enough for us to do an easy sleepy shuffle to the toilet.

Again I’ll admit we got very lucky. At age 4 years and 2 months, he said no more diapers or Pull-ups mom and that was that. I told him ok bud, let’s go for it. And remember if you wake up in the night and have to pee just call out for Mom or Dad. If you have an accident, that’s OK!

Now, that being said, if he didn’t just tell me one night that he was all done with pull-ups and it carried on much beyond age 4, we would have changed course and attempted the sleepy pee.

In the Oh Crap Potty Training Method, Glowacki recommends not going much beyond 3-1/2 years old for nighttime potty training, as there is a risk of the bladder muscles atrophying from not being trained to hold the pee all night.

And again, since Oh Crap worked so well for us during the day, I tended to believe her.

Remember, there are always options and it’s important to be flexible in your thinking. As I said, we waited until our son was 4, not 3 1/2. If something is working, keep on with it. If it’s not working, keep an open mind to explore other avenues. Try not to stress! True in life as well as potty training!

And night time potty training is a whole different animal than day time. It’s a physical thing.

Why is Night Time Potty Training Different From Day Time?

Tackling nighttime potty training is very different from daytime. What works for one child, may not work for another and that’s a fact. Doctors and experts agree though that one of the main factors is neurological readiness. Maybe it shouldn’t even be called “training” for this reason, but it is commonly worded this way.

A lot of it really boils down to biology.

It’s all about consolidation and the ability to hold. Much of night time potty training is about your child’s little body able to hold in the pee all night.

So, just because they are agreeable, willing and are 100% dry during the day doesn’t mean they are developmentally ready to be dry all night. Asking what age should a child be dry at night begs an impossible definite answer. There’s quite a range.

It takes more than just a certain chronological age. It’s your child’s unique physical development.

Consider daytime potty training, some kids can hold it forever and some have to pee 4 times an hour. Their bladders need to be developed enough and that is something we as parents have no control over. And yes some kids wet the bed until 6,7 8 years old and even older. There are various reasons for nighttime bedwetting in older children such as genetic predisposition.

How will I know when it’s time to give it a try?

If your child is completely daytime potty trained and still wearing a Pull-up or diaper at night but suddenly has a stretch of 3-5 nights when they stay completely dry overnight, it’s time to try nighttime potty training. Also, if they are staying dry for long stretches during the day, (around 2-3 hours) that’s a good indicator.

This is a promising sign that their bladder has developed to the point where holding and consolidation are happening.

If you miss this window and leave the pull-up on, there’s a good chance they will just go back to peeing at night.

And you can’t blame them really, it’s what they know. They know the diaper is on so of course, they will. You may even notice in the morning that they have just peed in their diaper or pull-up when they woke up. You can tell when you take it off because it’s still warm.

should you wake your child to pee for night time potty training

Oh Crap Night Time Potty Training Tips

Here are the things that we found helpful from the OCTP method. Even though we did not wake our child up to pee at night, these tips were super worthwhile to know.

Monitor Fluids

Start heavy in the morning and taper down fluids as the day and evening go on. Think of it as an upside-down pyramid of liquids. Glowacki admits that she gets accused of telling people to dehydrate their child but really that’s not what she is saying. It makes sense that if you encourage drinking more earlier in the day, your child will not be as thirsty at night yes? Therefore, not dehydrated.

Obviously, you don’t want your child drinking a gallon of milk before bed but in all honesty, we did give our son a small drink if he wanted it. We used the catchphrase “Just One Ounce”, although it is probably a couple of ounces. During the day we give him plenty of liquids so he does not have a natural thirst at night. But if my kid is asking me for a small drink because he’s thirsty at bedtime, he’s getting a drink. Call me soft, but that’s just the way it is.

Ask Your Child To Hear More Pee

Ask your child if they can hear more pee when you take them for that last pee of the night. Often times when they are new to all this potty training a child might get in the habit of not squeezing out every drop. By asking them to hear a little more tinkling out is a good way to get them to empty their bladder more fully.

Layer Up The Waterproofing

We used a protective waterproof mattress cover, then the fitted sheet, topped with another pee pad.

This way if they do have an accident in the night, you will only have to quickly clean them up and change their pj’s instead of having to strip and remake the entire bed.

Keep an extra top sheet and blanket right in their bedroom so you’re ready for anything.

Chances are they will be upset if they wake up wet, so just stay cool, calm and collected. Keep your voice soothing, the lights low and tell them it’s ok, it was just an accident and they can go back to sleep.

Should You Wait Until Your Child Has Transitioned From Their Crib?

Ideally, yes. While it is possible to night time potty train when they are still sleeping in a crib, it will be easier if they’re in a big kid bed.

And whether or not you decide to do the dream pee and wake up your child at night to pee makes no difference. Potty training, both day and nighttime, is all about setting your child up for success and independence. Independence from diapers. Woohoo! If they are sleeping in a big kid bed, they will eventually just get up themselves and go to the bathroom on their own instead of calling out for you every time. Your child will be very proud of him or herself!

A Word About Heavy Sleepers

Perhaps you have a super-duper heavy sleeper on your hands. These kids can sleep through anything no matter how loud or uncomfortable. Like a freight train could go by outside their window and they would still be sawing logs.

If you are attempting to potty train overnight and your heavy sleeper wakes in the morning completely soaked and freezing cold but slept right through it, invest in a loud potty alarm. One that goes off at the first sign of wetness. A potty alarm can help to wake them and teach them autonomy.

Even if it doesn’t wake them up completely, you’ll hear it. I don’t know about you but ever since I had kids, I am an unbelievably light sleeper.

Night Time Potty Training: Final Thoughts

I genuinely hope hearing our experience with night time potty training can give you some guidance about the things to consider.

Whether you decide to wake your child at night to pee or not is ultimately and obviously a personal decision, as is using the OCPT method. Always choose what works best for your family.

And remember, every kid is different! Be attentive to their signs. The most important thing to remember when potty training at night is when they have 3-5 nights in a row with a dry diaper, that is your window!

Follow your child’s lead and with any luck at all, you will be done entirely with diapers from that day forward. We ditched them 3 months ago and have had dry nights ever since. Best of luck to you and don’t fret. You will get there!

Until next time, K.

Kelly Blakely is the founder and creative force behind Just Our View From Here. As a first-time mom over 40, she brings a fresh perspective to parenting and family life on her blog. Kelly also explores a wide range of lifestyle topics in her writing, including fashion, beauty, self-care, and well-being.

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